A bottle of 2014 Nebbiolo d’Alba sits on my kitchen cart alongside an empty to-go container that housed a date cake with whipped mascarpone from the Italian restaurant I work at in Evanston, IL. The electricity from a connected night with two lovely friends hangs in the air of my studio apartment as music blares from my Bose speaker, throwing the light of my candlelight back and forth.

Today, during a vocal coaching in between a Bach cantata and a Verdi aria, I received an email from the United States Fulbright Association revealing that I’m a semi-finalist for a Fulbright to attend the University of Gastronomic Sciences in Pollenzo, Italy. I burst out into tears in front of my vocal coach, who has had an important impact on my musical journey from rural Wisconsin to a top-ten University. The world seems to be working in my favor in ways that are beyond explanation.

Earlier in the day today, I was the focus of an interview by a writer at the Northwestern student publication North by Northwestern. I spent forty minutes explaining my summer research, and as I became more comfortable with the interview, I felt the passion and excitement bubbling underneath my words that transported me back to my summer of planned spontaneity. I began to remember the feeling from the streets of Rome to the mountains of Switzerland and stringing through all of the major Italian cities I set foot in; an invisible force leading me from one fulfilling evening and lesson learned to another.

This blog has followed my journey from a Portland Half Marathon before my summer research until now, and I have never felt more secure in my path than I do sitting in my bed on the 7th floor of my Main St. apartment than this very moment. The taste of Nebbiolo, a grape strongly associated with Piemonte, where the University of Gastronomic Sciences resides, speaks to my palate and tells me that the next email I’ll receive from the Fulbright committee will bless me; whether a welcome into the financial freedom of $30,000 towards my master education or the opportunity to learn how to figure it out on my own without the financial support of the US Government… I am thankful.

I am thankful.

Cheers, with a glass of Nebbiolo, to a year of connecting my story to others’ in this beautiful, complicated world.

Dreaming

So, Ti.. Do. So, Ti.. Do. So, Ti.. Do. So, Ti.. Do. So, Ti.. Do. 

Philip Glass’s repetitive whirling of tones circles my apartment, my flickering candlelight moving with the sound pressure waves vibrating through it and through me. Never have I heard the piece like I have today. For some reason, the revelation of the vocal line repeating the pitches on solfege never stood out in this way. Things music school does to your brain….

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In music school, the principal foundations of musical theory are set freshman year when we learn musical counterpoint.

In most of this music, the melody dances around the tonal centerpiece in different patterns and according to different rules and returns to do. As history moved along, people started changing the rules, breaking the rules, and reinventing new soundscapes.

I won’t go into details, but essentially, music is obsessed with “do”. I use solfege everyday in class, but I haven’t thought about it in a new context until now.

Recently, I listened to a Tim Ferris podcast about Essentialism. The guest, Greg McKeown, author of Essentialism: The Disciplined Pursuit of Less, maintains that in a world of noise, information overload, and choice anxiety, revealing your individual essential goals, pursuits, and dreams is a powerful path to success. I’d agree with Ferris that learning about yourself is the first and foremost tool to develop your sense of identity, path… essentialism.

Philip Glass’s sound waves revealed something to me today. Essentialism is about finding your “Do”. What do you return back to?

Glass: Dance IX

Just returned to reality from two days of meditation and mindfulness at the Geumsunsa Temple in Bukhansan National Park just north of the Seoul city center.

A train and two busses later from my hip hostel in Hongdae neighborhood, I arrived at the base of a mountain, famished. I bopped into a steamy restaurant and the waitress pointed to the wall with a menu in Korean. I assumed she asked me what I wanted so I pointed at something that was 15000 won, with a twinge of excitement at the unknown. She brought out the typical side dishes of kimchi and other pickled vegetables, and soon arrived with a steaming bowl of broth with tripe. I happily finished it.

I hiked partway up the mountain and through the arches of the temple, the sound of a trickling stream and the clearing of the crisp air from the less-than-clean air in Seoul bringing a sense of calm. Upon arriving, I was handed traditional garb and shown to my small room that I shared with a lovely girl from Finland..

Through these meditative hours, I learned that the path to mindfulness is always there. The path to a better you is always being laid.

I prostrate in recognition that all relations are a mirror reflecting myself.

I have led a very lucky and fortunate life. Every solo travel that I’ve taken, from Mexico City to Lisbon, London to Canada, has taught me the importance of acknowledging how unimportant, small and insignificant we all really are. Yet, the collective impact we have on one another is increasingly broad as globalization means we can easily hop on a plane and see the nooks and crannies of this world. With this opportunity comes a great responsibility to spread light, joy, and prove that we are all one.

I believe that everyone has an autonomous ability to attract what they want in the world, and the Buddhist principals that I learned about in this stay will become a guide for my life moving forward. Here are some of my favorites:

“I prostrate wishing to find the beauty hidden in my mind”

“I prostrate being mindful of my unknown potential”

“I prostrate wishing to embrace the life with pure passion”

“I prostrate wishing to embrace life with a humble mind”

“I prostrate trusting that a full life comes out of myself”

“I prostrate in repentance about having seen I and others as separate”

“I prostrate in recognition that the mind is the root of all things”

“I prostrate in recognition that I am the one who decides all things”

“I prostrate in recognition that the one who is different from me is not wrong”

“I prostrate in gratitude to the poverty that I experienced”

“I prostrate in awe that I dream as freely as possible”

“I prostrate in recognition that barriers are barriers as long as I keep them”

“I prostrate in recognition that I am free as much as I give up”

“I prostrate wishing not to miss the question, ‘who am I’?”